If in the darkness...life your eyes to the stars.
I resonate with that quote quite a bit. When things are looking grim, look up.
My hubby did something that really irritated me today, and it just irked the heck out of me, so...I went to go get the laundry in the commercial laundry room in our apartment comples, it's two apartment houses over and in the basement. So, I went to the laundry room, and instead of just taking the clothes out of the dryer, which usually takes me about 5 or less minutes of my time...I took longer than that. I was so flustered that I couldn't even take the entire load of laundry out from the dryer (big dryer by the way, I always put two loads at a time to dry). So yeah...I was just huffed and puffed, a little angry but mostly irritated. And there so happens to be a nice sofa-type cushony chair downstairs in the laundry room. So I certainly took the liberty of plopping over on it and just sitting there silently. I'm the type of person that if I'm super stressed out or mad, and somebody is trying to talk to me and they ask me questions, I will just sit there in silence and not answer their questions. By doing so, I am giving myself the time to breathe deeply, concentrating on relaxing and calming down, and by not worrying myself with whatever it is that is going on at the current moment. I've learned to do this and learned that it is crucial for me to go through this process otherwise if I try to engage in conversation directly out of an arguement, I end up exploding on whomever I am speaking with or I end up really getting irritated with them. And when that happens, my heart is just filled with angst and tons of pumping adrenaline...I'm sure my heart rate goes up pretty high as well as my blood pressure which I'm sure is not so good for me. Actuallly, I am positive that it's not. Isn't it funny? Well, not really I suppose. But! Did you know that when you argue, your blood pressure goes up above average? Infact, it shoots up to such an unhealthy point that it's even higher that regular high blood pressure! And that is bad for you!
But anyway..I took the liberty of just sitting there on that cushony plain sofa / chair in the middle of the laundry room, just trying to calm myself and let whatever that just transpired go. Just let the situation go. And maybe, I made too big a deal out of it. When I am upset, I am upset, and the only way I know how to calm down is to mentally block everything out and just focus on breathing deeply, thinking rationally (at least trying), and praying. But that's about it. And most of the time I'm pretty much just stuck on breathing deeply, and then everything gets better from that point on.
So I just took my sweet time in that laundry room, I may have been down there just sitting for about 15-20 minutes. And then I finally calmed myself down, got the courage to fold and stuff the rest of the laundry into the laundry basket, and off upstairs I went heading back to the house. As I walked in, Brian asked if I was mad at him, and guess what? I couldn't answer! My heart was back at the adrenaline pumping stage again, and so again I had to sit in silence for about 3 minutes. But, knowing us, we may have our huffs and puffs, but they don't last long. So we talked it out, both apologized, forgave, and went on with our day. And you know what? It's been good since.
But now of course I am exhausted an am ready to go to bed. Yep.
But basically...my point in telling this story is to make this point; when you're going through a tough time and things seem bleak, don't get carried into the darkness, instead, look up to the stars, and know that there is hope, there is light, and things will get better. I promise. And I'm not trying to disqualify your feelings either, they are legit, and you have the right to feel what you feel, and your feelings are validated. BUT...don't get carried away and don't make the situation worse and dramatic than it really is. (Most of the time a situation is only as dramatic as we make it, unless there is death, seperation, or something serious along those lines). We often make one drama or series of dramas into a huge pile up of dramas, and after residue has been created, it's often times hard to erase. BUT, nevertheless, we don't give up, and this ladies and gents, is when we certainly musn't give up, but we most hold on to hope with dear life, and we must fix our eyes upon the stars, not relying on our own sight, because we can't see, and the present around us looks dark and bleak, but when we look up to the stars, a light is shone and we know that this too, shall pass, and that there WILL be better days ahead.
And guys, don't wallow in the darkness, but let that star that you lift your eyes to be a friend, a family member, or God. However, you must decide to look up at that shining light and not sit and sink deeper into the darkness still.
I often times look to God. And some times I seek the light in my friends, and everytime I do, (seek), I am lifted up, I am brushed off, and I am no longer blind, sitting and being swallowed up in the dark like I used to.
The point is guys; reach out for help, let others help you, put your trust in hope, and your hope in faith. And just keeping going. Keep your eyes fixed on the light.
K guys,
I am peacing out,
Peace,
-Your Fellow Chocolatier.
P.S., is there somebody out there that you need to consciously make the decision about to allow them to be a light in your life?
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